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The History: A couple of years ago, I started journaling my prayers and God's responses to them. I told my friends about this, they were really interested. I told my Pastor about it and he said, how about sharing those on line. When I asked God, He said, my words are for you, but not just for you. And, here we are...I hope He speaks to you in these words.
My prayer:
What an awesome night God! It seems a little crazy that some of my most intense times of worship with you have occurred sitting in my car. No big church, no big band and sound system, no choir, just you, me, sometimes a friend, and some anointed music.
I wonder what all the folks on 6th Ave. were thinking tonight...two women singing, laughing, praying, and worshiping in a car on the side of the road. I know sometimes the music was so loud that the car was shaking. At the time though, I didn't see anyone but you. I didn't hear anyone but you.
God, in those intense, intimate times with you I am reminded that all of the rest of it is worth it. I am fully convinced that I will do, not do, and give anything you want me to. There is nothing I will hold back from you. There is nothing that you ask that I won't give you. God I know that if you ask for it, it is better with you than with me.
I love you God. Thank you for the new experiences tonight God and thank you for giving me the courage to speak the things you were telling me. Thank you for new levels of intimacy and service. Thank you for everything God.
What God Said Tonight:
What, you think worship time is over for the night? We have just begun. You are in for the experience of your lifetime so far, if you are willing. I want to stay with you tonight and not leave and not go silent. I have a lot to tell you about if you are willing.
I want to tell you tonight there is a purpose and plan to fulfill. There are events taking place, right now that will affect eternity. There are people being born right now that I have waited an eternity for. There are decisions being made that will form the direction of the future. There are decision being made that will hinder and help the plan to unfold.
You are a part of it all. You are an essential part of the quilt I have woven that is the future. You are the thread that holds pieces together. You are a seam that defines the shape. You are the structure that the pieces fit in to make the mosaic of life.
I have a destiny and a purpose for each of my children. Some are the quilt pieces that fill a specific spot. They are all so beautiful and so different. They are beautiful on their own but their true beauty comes out as they become a part of the larger pattern.
Then there are people like you. People who are the thread that define, shape, and hold together the quilt. The thread is beautiful too although not always noticed. However, without the thread, the quilt would just be a pile of remnants. The thread is what brings the remnants together.
Finally, their is the designer. The one who decides what pieces go where, what stitches go where, how big the quilt will be. I am the designer. Follow my lead and we will make a beautiful quilt together.
I love you daughter. Tonight was wonderful for me too. We will continue to reach new levels for as long as you are willing. There is no limit to me and there is no limit to what we can do together if you are willing to trust and risk it all for me.
My prayer:
You are Amazing, Beautiful, Caring, Delightful, Ever present, Father, God, Holy, Inspirational, Joy, King, Love, Mighty, Noble, Outstanding, Patient, Quiet in the storm , Righteous, Sovereign Trustworthy, Uncontainable, Victory, Wonderful, eXcellent, Yaweh, and Zealous! You are everything God, A-Z, Alpha to Omega, you are everything! I love you God. Thank you for this blessed and wonderful day! What is on your mind tonight awesome Father?
What God Said Tonight:
Ah, that was cute daughter! You kind of cheated on the X though...but I love it anyway! I love that you are lightened up. Things have been pretty serious lately but there is a freedom and lightness in you today and tonight that is refreshing.
It is good to be with you tonight and do nothing but enjoy being with you. I don't have much to say, I don't have any sage advice for you tonight. I just want to abide with you and enjoy being with you. No pressure, no desperation, no needs, just for a little bit. Just you and me and this great love that we have.
There is so much power in that love. There is so much peace in that love. There is so much of what you need just in that love that we have for each other. Love is the most powerful force in the world and it will overcome everything in the end. Let me love you tonight. Let me feel your love for me tonight. Let the love that we have over power everything else.
Mmmm...there we go, rest in my love forever....
My prayer:
What an awesome day God! You are so amazing. Thank you for showing me what I needed to do today. Thank you for giving me the courage to do it. Thank you God for blessing it and working it all out. I feel so free!!
You are so amazing God. You always know what I need to do, learn, say, not do, and everything. Help me God to ALWAYS listen to you. Thank you for teaching me how to listen and how to be obedient to what you say quickly. I use to fumble around so much with resisting, avoiding, and rebelling. Not that I don't do some of that still, but you have taught me how to see it so much quicker and that cuts out so much of the pain. Kind of like a band-aid, rip it off quick and it doesn't hurt as bad.
I love you so much God. I would be so worthless if you hadn't saved me. I would be less than worthless if you didn't keep teaching and helping me everyday. I need you so much. Thank you Jesus!
What God Said Tonight:
You were tied with a rope around your ankle that was no less real just because it wasn't visible. You had been tugging against that rope, trying to get away, to move forward and it was exhausting you. It was straining and leaving marks on you. It was marking you as a prisoner. You pulled until you fell.
Untying the rope was the easiest and the hardest thing in the world to do. The ropes in your life are untied with forgiveness. Giving it, asking for it, forgiveness frees you from being bound and held back.
Anytime you are not moving forward and feeling stuck. Look for the unforgiveness. Most always there is either someone you need to forgive or someone you need to ask forgiveness from. True forgiveness takes a sacrifice and is not easy. But, once it is done, you will wonder why you waited so long.
You are free tonight from the bondage of unforgiveness. Stay free my daughter. Run from unforgiveness. It is an enemy that will trap you every time. Forgiveness is the key to release you. I love you. I forgive you. Be mine forever.
My prayer:
Awesome, amazing God I worship you. My focus is you tonight God. Sometimes I get so tied up in my own stuff, I forget to enjoy you. Tonight is about enjoying you, worshiping you, loving you.
God, how do I describe you? How do I describe that experience like no other where you fill me, fill the atmosphere, and create something beyond the natural experience.
God, my life is good; but, if I had this exact same life without you in it, it would be worth nothing at all. "Life" without you is not life at all.
God I feel you here tonight. I hear you God. You are always welcome God, wherever I am you are welcome. If I am there, consider yourself a VIP guest. Well I guess you can't be a guest since you created, own, and are God of everything. You are and will always be my +1 God. If they invite me, they better understand you are coming with me. We are a package deal.
Thank you for being you and being in me God. I love you so much. What is on your mind tonight.
What God Said Tonight:
I am your one and only and you are mine. I am so jealous over you. I hate it when you lose your focus off of me. Not because I need it but because you need it. You need to stay focused on me or things start going south in your life.
Whenever I see you let things get in the way of you and me, whether it is worry, business, friends, TV, work or just general sin, it hurts me so much. Then I get angry. The pain I feel is more for you and what those choices will do to you. The anger is about satan getting foothold in your life. He has no right in your life, but when you lose focus you open the door to him and he will always take more than you offer him. He never leaves empty handed.
I can't stand to see you give pieces of yourself to him. You belong to me. All of you. I love you so much, I love all of you. I don't want you to be less you than you are because you let him in. Keep the door shut on him for your sake and mine.
Keep your focus on me and we will do great things. Carry that focus throughout your day and we can start having fun again. It has all been pretty serious lately which is ok. We all need serious time. But I am ready for some fun. I am ready to have some fun with you again. You are everything to me and I love you.
My prayer:
God, my God who I can bring anything to. God, thank you for never getting tired of me bringing stuff to you to handle. Thank you for hearing me and taking care of it all.
Father, it has been a tough couple of days but I trust you. I trust that you are going to turn it all to my good. I trust that you will never leave me. I trust that you have a plan and a purpose for my life and it is good. I trust God that this season, like every season is only temporary. I refuse to get stuck here.
God you are so good. You bless me, you keep me in divine health, you provide for me, you teach me, you save me from myself time and time again. Grateful is too little of a word. Thank you is not enough.
God my life is yours now and forever. Show me what you want me to do and what you don't want me to do. Show me what I need to change. Show me how to be everything that you need me to be. Help me to be the blessing.
I love you so much God. Even in my most discouraged moment, I haven't lost hope in you and knowing that you will bring me out. I believe we have many more days of joy to live out together. I believe that we have a lot more to accomplish. I will encourage myself God and I will follow you out. In Jesus name, amen.
What God Said Tonight:
That is better. Think on good things. Think on the promises not on the struggle. You know what to do. You have been taught. You don't have to stay in the season of doubt for one more second if you don't want to.
I have not given you a spirit of fear. I have given you a spirit of power, love, and a sound mind. Take that power, love, and your sound mind and use them. No weapon formed against you is going to prosper. I have taken care of it. Trust my promise.
The evidence, what you see, is going to lie to you for a little while longer. Trust me and not what you see right now. The darkness is trying to overshadow you. You can see and feel it out of the corner of your eye. It cannot prosper. It cannot have you. You are light. You live with my light inside of you. And, where there is light, there cannot be darkness. The darkness will be overpowered by the light every time. Live in my light in your life. Trust my light to lead you and guide you. Trust that people see the light. The light is truth. The dark is the lie.
The dark has already fled while we talked here tonight. Can you feel the new lightness in you? Rejoice, celebrate it! We are coming out on the other side of this thing unharmed and stronger than ever. I love you daughter. You are stronger than you think. Stay in the light and banish the dark.
My prayer:
I am pretty crazy about you God. I know I have been feeling a bit sorry for myself lately, seeing the things that I don't have in my life, seeing the lack in me, etc. But fact is, having you in my life, living, active, and manifested in my life is better than anything or anyone I could ever imagine. You really are everything I need.
I am so tired of these cycles where I feel like I am one bad decision away from massive failure. I don't know where they come from. Most of the time, fear of failure isn't a problem anymore. You have shown me how failure is really just an opportunity and most of the time that is how I see it. But every once in awhile, I start feeling like something really horrible is right around the corner. I get to feeling that I am about to mess up so big, it will be really tough to get over it.
The thing is, almost all of the time when I feel like this, nothing happens. That let's me know that it is a lie and I should ignore it. But I start to think, what if this time it is you trying to warn me about something. What if this time, it is true. Uggh! I said I wasn't going to go here tonight God but I guess it is still weighing on my heart.
Help me God to see and know the truth. Help me to make good decisions. Help me God to pull out of this. I really don't like it. Forgive me God for whining tonight. I don't like that I am doing that either. I am sorry.
What God Said Tonight:
Can you mess up big enough that I can't fix it? I am God. I am the ruler of the universe. I am the all powerful and mighty God. Could you ever, even if you tried really hard, mess up big enough that I couldn't fix it? Of course not. The only decision you can make that would keep me from fixing it is if you chose to keep me out of your life. Otherwise, as long as I am in your life, I can fix anything you get wrong.
That being said, don't go about and try to do things wrong. There are consequences, natural consequences for actions and I don't want you to suffer if you don't have to. But big time mess ups, they are well within my ability to turn them around to your good.
When I give you a warning about something bad coming your way, I will always give you the answer of how to deal with it. I will never leave you with just the impending doom and worry. If all you have is worry and fear, you know who those are from. He is spending a lot of time on you right now. In this battle, I need you to remember everything you have learned. Even more, I need you to trust me to fight it.
Keep bringing this stuff to me. I can only truly help you when you bring it to me. If you hold onto it because you are ashamed or because you don't want to complain, then I can't address it directly, which is always the most effective approach.
I love you daughter. You are not on the edge of doom, you are on the edge of your breakthrough. You are on the edge of the next level that will be glorious. I am already celebrating where you are going. I am celebrating your future. Trust me to be big enough to take care of you and all that you do. I will guide you and lead you but not through fear. I will always guide you through peace and hope. I love you so much. Trust, rest, and keep praying.
My Prayer:
Awesome Father. I am kind of lost in my own thoughts tonight. Today was wonderful. Thank you for giving me a rest day. I really needed it. This week was a bit tough.
But now, having gotten rested, I have so many thoughts going through my head. I am trying to focus on the things that really matter. So much of what is running through my head doesn't matter. It is stuff I barely care about and I know it is stuff that you don't care about. And, if I know that you don't care about it, why do I care about it at all?
God, sometimes, like now, when I look at myself, all I see are the flaws, the spots. All I can see is where I fall short. All I can see is the things I didn't do or the the things I didn't do right.
I worry at times that this is the real picture of me. That this is how other people see me. That people only see me as a messed up screw up. I worry that I have hurt people that I don't even realize I have hurt. I worry that I am blind to my areas for improvement. I sure am using that worry word a lot tonight.
God, to sum it all up, I worry that I am not good enough and that I am a poor reflection of you. You want me to show people how amazing it is to live with you and I am trying, but sometimes I worry that what they see is me messing things up instead of seeing how amazing you are.
God, I know that you tell me I am the head and not the tail, I am above and not beneath and I am a royal priesthood. And, I know that through Christ, I am all of those things, at least in the spiritual realm. But in the day to day, when I go to work, when I hang out with friends, when I go to the grocery store, what do they see? Am I the reflection you want me to be or am I still too much of a mess dealing with my own stuff?
Dear God, make me a blessing to everyone around me. Don't let me mess up anyone else's life because I am still dealing with my stuff. Please make it all right. I love you Father!
What God Said Tonight:
Interesting prayer tonight daughter. I thought we were through this. Someone has been beating up on you good. He has no right you know. He has no right to accuse you. He has no right to even talk to you. You are my daughter, bought and paid for, and satan has no place in your life or in your thoughts.
You are all of the things you knew I would say that you are and more. I cannot let you talk badly about my precious daughter. You are my heart being shown to the world. If you think that is ugly, than you think I am ugly. I am reflected in you, in every word and in every action I am reflected through you and that is beautiful.
You are living under some false beliefs tonight. You are listening to lies. I know that you know what those lies sound like and who lies to you. He has done it so many times in your past. You know his voice. Don't listen to it. Don't listen to the lies.
Do you have areas to work on, you bet and we will always be working on areas to make you the best reflection of me that you can be. But, like with your own child, they are not less precious and amazing just because they don't know how to ride a bike yet. They will learn and that will be great when they do. But, until they do, it doesn't make them less wonderful.
You are the best you that you can be for what you know today. Tomorrow, you will know more and you will be an even better you. As long as you remain open and teachable, we will never have an issue around this.
I love you right where you are. I will love you tomorrow. I will love when you learn to "ride a bike" and I will love when you haven't yet learned. I will tell you right now that you are precious and that you are the reflection I need you to be. Be real, be transparent, and people will see this life we have together and that will be more powerful and attractive than you can imagine. It is beautiful, you are beautiful, and we are beautiful together. I love you so much. Renew yourself in that love tonight.
