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Saturday, September 11, 2010

Feelings...

My prayer:
Mighty God. I am a bit of a mess tonight. I am way too focused on me tonight. You know how that messes me up. Why is it that no matter how many amazing and incredible things you do in my life, I eventually get stuck thinking about the things I don't have instead of the things I do have? I hate that about me. I get all tied up about what hasn't happened yet instead of loving what has happened.

I know you tell me you created me to be always wanting the next new thing, but sometimes that works against me I think. Or maybe I just think about it wrong. I'm sure it is me. I am sure that if I could see it all from your viewpoint, it would make sense. But, I am looking at it right now from my viewpoint and I am feeling alone, lonely and disconnected. I am feeling like I am off by myself and I don't like it.

I can already hear you saying, "don't trust your feelings" and "you are not alone", but sometimes, the feelings are very real and hard to dismiss. God, I need your help, right now, tonight. I need your comfort, right now, tonight. I need you, right now, tonight.

What God said tonight:
Your healing is not quite complete. You are not quite whole. That is why you still struggle with this now and then We have some more work to do. We have some more time to spend making you whole.

You have been created to be whole and to be my perfect daughter. Life gets in the way and takes chinks out of you. But, I can fill them back up. Let me fill you tonight daughter. Let me hold you and let you know that you are never alone again.

You are never on your own again. You will always have me on your side. You will always have me in your corner. You will have so many others in your life as well too. You are more loved than you know. You have more people on your side than you know. But regardless of that, I am on your side. I, the most high God of all creation is on your side and I love you more than you will ever imagine.

You will know from this moment on that I am yours. I an in you and will never leave you. Feel my presence and know that I am God but I am also you Daddy and your husband. I am the love that you yearn for. I am what you are searching for and I am here, for you, right now.

Reach out and feel me in your spirit. I wish I could reach out and touch you in the physical but that would freak you out a little too much. Some day. Some day we can be close like that, but for now, feel my in your heart and in your spirit knowing that my love for you is more real than anything else in the world.

I love you. You are not alone. You are not disconnected. You are my daughter, a royal priesthood and everything I planned for you is coming into existence. Love you with my whole presence. Feel me tonight. Trust that feeling.

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