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The History: A couple of years ago, I started journaling my prayers and God's responses to them. I told my friends about this, they were really interested. I told my Pastor about it and he said, how about sharing those on line. When I asked God, He said, my words are for you, but not just for you. And, here we are...I hope He speaks to you in these words.
My prayer:
Mighty God. I am not sure if I am going to actually post this tonight, but there are some things I need to get off of my chest. If, when we are done, you don't want it on the blog, let me know and it will be just between us.
The thing is I am really frustrated. I am so sick of church for the sake of church. I am so sick of religion without relationship with you. I am so sick and tired of knowing what your promises are, but seeing us, your children, not expecting to have those promises in our lives. If you made the promises, and you never lie, we should expect them and we should see them everyday in our lives.
I am sick of talking about growing churches instead of growing your kingdom. God, I don't care where people go to church. I just care that they get to know you, really get to know you and that can be easier if they have people who already know you to help them out. But when it comes with all of the trappings of traditional church, it sometimes can mess them up more than help them.
God you are better than what we show you off as in church. You are better than how I am reflecting you.
God, you have put me in a community of believers that has a vision to have a church that is more about knowing you than it is about "having church" and that is awesome; but, right now, I find myself stuck in a rut, doing things because that's what you do when you have a church, not because it is edifying you or helping people to know you better. Not because it is getting me or anyone else closer to you.
God, you are amazing. You bless me in little and big ways every day. You teach me, change me, heal me, guide me, provide for me, and do everything for me. You deserve so much more than me going through the motions.
God, show me what to change. Show me where I got off track. God show me what you want.
What God Said Tonight:
Thanks for getting that out. It has been bubbling up in you for awhile and it was beginning to interfere with our relationship, so I am glad you finally got it out where we can deal with it.
Living for me, being in relationship with me, getting to know me, seeing my promises reflected in your everyday life is a process not something that is ever completed. You never "arrive" as they say, in a relationship with me. I am eternal and you are eternal now and we will be building this relationship for eternity.
You have shaken off a lot of the trappings of religion without relationship and that is good. Now you are feeling the need to do more and that is good too. That means that you want to get closer to me and that is a good thing. Now that you have asked me about it, asked for my help, I can guide you. I can show you the things that matter and the things that don't. You might be surprised by some of the things that I think matter and don't matter.
Whenever you question whether something is worthwhile and growing the kingdom of God, look for the root of it in the Bible, in my life. If you see it there, then look for the fruit. Is it actually growing my Kingdom? Is it actually helping people know me better? If you get "yeses" to those questions, you can be pretty sure that it is worthwhile and I am all for it. It is not nearly as complicated as you make it sometimes.
There are some things that you are doing right now that, because of the way you are doing them, they are not worthwhile; however, if you see them in a different light, you will see that they could be done in a way that meets all the criteria.
Remember as well that I can get through to people even when the presentation is not perfect. I have been doing it for thousands of years. You didn't have perfect teaching or guidance all of the time but you made it here. You made it to a point where you can talk to me about anything and you trust and know that I will answer you. You have arrived at a place where you are so excited about our relationship that you are desperate for other people to know about it. That didn't happen because of any one person, any one church. That happened because I wanted you. That happened because I had a plan and a purpose for you from the beginning of time.
The problem now is not in what you are doing but in some cases, the problem is how you are doing it. I have given you many opportunities. Every one has a purpose, both to build my Kingdom and to build your character.
I love you daughter. It is fine to post this. I promise you are not the only one who is feeling this way and you are not the only one with this prayer. Never be ashamed of the truth. I am the truth, the way, and the life and I am here for you always.
My prayer:
Incredible God. I am at a loss for words tonight...that doesn't happen very often, I know! There is a lot happening, good and not so good. But, I have prayed over all of that and now I need to leave it up to you.
Thank you God for always being there for us no matter what is going on. Thank you that I can never have a problem that is bigger than your ability to fix it. Thank you for always having the answer, no matter the problem.
Thank you God for your presence, your power, your guidance, and most of all your love. God I need you more than I need air. Without you, I don't need to breathe. It would not be worth it without you. I love you and am so grateful to have you in my life and to be in your presence.
What God Said Tonight:
There are storm clouds in your life right now. It is dark tonight and the only light is from the occasional lightening. This won't last long. It is a passing storm. It is dark and a serious storm. You need to take shelter in me from the storm. It will not stay for long.
You have many sunny days ahead. You have a rainbow promise in your future. Weather the storm with me, huddle under my shelter and stay safe and warm. The storm is here but it can't really touch you as long as you stay under my protection. Wait it out and you will be back dancing in the sunshine in no time.
I love you my sunshine.
My prayer:
Awesome God, my heart is breaking a bit tonight. It is so much easier for me to go through tough times than it is to watch other people suffer. I hate seeing other people suffering. I hate seeing them dealing with unexplainable pain. When I am going through it, I know you will work it out. I know that you never waste a hurt and that you will turn it to my good. The same is true for other people but instead of focusing on that, I find myself focusing on the pain. God, it hurts to see them hurt.
God I pray for all of the hurting people tonight. I pray God that you comfort every one who is hurting tonight. I pray God that you give them a hope and you give them peace tonight. I pray God that you comfort them in their pain. I pray God that you somehow heal and show them that this thing that has happened to them is not the end of the story. This thing is the beginning of a testimony of how big you are and how you can take anything, no matter how bad, and turn it around. God help us tonight. In Jesus name, I ask this. amen.
What God Said Tonight:
I did not bring the pain but I brought the healing. I did not bring the sin, but I brought the redemption. I am the answer to every problem.
I love you daughter and if you did not hurt a little for the people who are hurting around you, then you would not be who I created you to be. I gave you a heart for people, a compassion so you could love them, help them, pray for them. You are doing your job. Don't get stuck in the pain though. Your job is to go into the pain and bring them out. Your job is to remember that I am the answer and give me to them. Your job is to remember every time I brought you out of pain and terrible situations and give them that hope.
There is nothing that has happened or that will happen that I don't already know about and that I don't already have an answer planned out for. I have made a way out of every situation. I need you to help people see it. Be the hope and help point the way.
I love you daughter and I have heard your prayers. My minsitering angels are visiting people right now. They are arriving in their homes, in the bars, in the many places where people are hurting tonight and they wrapping their arms around them.
I will be their hope. I will be their answer. You be my reflection and point them in my direction. I will catch each and every one as they fall. I love you and I promise I will never drop any of you.
My prayer:
Amazing God! Tonight was just what I needed God! Intense prayer and worship with some of your kids who love you as much as I do. I am fully sated, satisfied, and more relaxed than I have been in months. YOU ARE SO GOOD!
God, you have met every one of my needs tonight. What is on your mind? Is there anything I can do for you?
What God Said Tonight:
You have already given to me tonight my daughter. Tonight was as much for me as it was for you. That is the wonderful thing about worship. You worship me, it fills you up, and it touches me. It lets us get closer together. It lets you know me better and it lets me more into your life. Worship is the place that we can meet face-to-face. Worship is the intimate place where I can whisper and you still hear me.
I love you daughter. Sleep tonight knowing that I loved tonight even more than you did. I love you. You have done all that I have asked and I will bless and prosper you beyond your ability to imagine it. It is going to be crazy but it will be true. You are going to look back in the very near future and shake you head, having trouble believing that your life could be as good as it is going to get. It will seem too good to be true but it will be true. When that time comes, receive it, accept it, and recognize it for what it is, evidence of me in your life that will be undeniable to anyone who sees.
I love you daughter. Rest now and sleep well.
My prayer:
My awesome God. My mind is all over the place tonight. Today was a mix of wonderful things and frustrating things...a normal kind of day I guess. There is so much going on, some of it is important and a lot of it isn't...a normal kind of life I guess.
God, I am ready for some extraordinary stuff. I am ready to see you move and do things that I can't even imagine right now. I am ready to see you do crazy miracles that no one will be able to believe but no one will be able to deny. God I am ready for you to strut your stuff!!!
I love you God. I don't need miracles to love you. I just love seeing your power in action and changing lives. I want to be a part of that every day for the rest of my life. I want your miracle power to be a part of my "normal life." You are incredible God and I love you with all that I am.
What God Said Tonight:
You are a miracle junky my sweet daughter, but it is ok. I am desperate for people who are willing to look for and believe that my miracle power is still active and alive. I do so many things that get passed over or that people give credit elsewhere. At least with you, I know that you will point to me as the source.
I have tried for years to get peoples attention with miracles. It seldom works. But, because I already have your attention, I can show you things that will blow your mind. I can do things in your life that will shake your understanding of normal. I will do things in this next season that you have only dreamed about.
You are going to see the spiritual realm and the physical realm come together in a way that you have never known before. The barriers between the two is breaking down. It will not be long before there is no barrier and the spiritual and the physical will dwell together regularly. You will see a whole new normal then.
I love you daughter and you will see all that you yearn to see and more. We are in for a very exciting time and I am pleased that it will be with you. I always wanted it that way.
My prayer:
Hi awesome God! I was realizing something tonight...when Paul was in prison and writing all of those letters to the different churches he had helped to get started, he had no idea that what he was writing would become the bulk of our "New Testament."
I think that is really true of so many things we do for you. It starts as one simple act of obedience to something that you put on our heart. It starts out with one simple blog entry on a warm June night. It starts with one kind act to someone who doesn't "deserve" it. It starts so small, but then you take it and it becomes something AMAZING! I am still in awe God at how many people you have reached through this blog. And that's just the people I know about.
That is one of the reasons I am so excited about this next new thing, the Intense Prayer and Worship group. It has all the markings of one of those small acts of obedience that turns into something more amazing than I could ever imagine on my own. I am so excited to see what you do with it!!
Thank you God for being a God of multiplication. Thank you for taking my small acts and turning them into amazing, life changing events. I love you so much God and I promise I will keep doing the small acts of obedience and waiting in anticipation to see what you do with them!!!
What God Said Tonight:
There really is no small acts of obedience. You know how I have told you there is no difference to me between sins? All sin is the same to me. I hate it all. Similarly, all acts of obedience to me are the same. There is no small act or large act.
There are some that require more sacrifice, but sometimes the act that seems so small is the one with the biggest sacrifice. Remember the widow's mite. She gave less than anyone but it was all that she had. Her gift was the smallest but her sacrifice was the greatest. I look at the sacrifice and I place value on that.
What are you willing to give up for me? What are you not willing to give up for me? Anything in the second column, anything you are not willing to give up is something that has the potential of leading you down the wrong track. I won't always ask you to sacrifice it, but I need to know and you need to know that you would be willing to if I asked.
It is like Abraham and Isaac. I never would have allowed him to sacrifice Isaac. Isaac was the future of my people. But I had to know that Abraham was willing to sacrifice everything for me so I could know that nothing would stand in the way of what we needed to do.
I love you daughter and I gave up everything for you. If we are going to have the relationship I intended, I need to know you could give up everything for me. I don't want you to answer me now. I need you to really think about this. I don't want the pat religious answer where you glibly say you would give anything for me, knowing that I won't ask you to give everything. I need you to really think about it. We will talk more later when you are ready but think about it...
My prayer:
Amazing teacher, my God. Thank you so much for what you said last night!! It made all the difference in the world. I had forgotten to pray blessings over him and as soon as I did, my heart COMPLETELY turned around and I saw it all in a completely different light!
I can't believe I forgot something so basic, but thank you for reminding me. Thank you even more for releasing me from the bitterness. That was awful and I don't ever want to go back! I hope I learned my lesson for good this time!
God I love you so much. Thank you for being a God of love. Thank you for being love God. I sometimes try to imagine what my life would be like if you were not like you are. I try to imagine what life is like for people who have gods other than you. Not because I want that but I just wonder and it hits me every time that if your core was anything other than love, I would be so miserable. I would live without hope.
I am not explaining it well God, but hear my heart. I can love you without reservation because you are love. If you were anything but you, I would not be able to fully trust or love and that would keep me from knowing you and having the life you planned for me. Because you are you, I can love you without reservation and trust you without reservation. I love that I never have to hold back with you. I can be exactly who I am and know that you love me. That is a really good feeling.
Thank you for loving me, accepting me, and for being you God!
What God Said Tonight:
My sweet little bird, you fly through this life, doing and seeing more than most people ever do and you still think that you are not doing enough. You still think that you are not good enough. You still think somehow that you should have it all figured out by now.
Those are not my expectations of you. I expect you to be continually learning. I expect you to have to learn some things more than once. I expect you to stumble and I expect you to fall.
I also expect you to learn how to get back up. I expect you to learn how to lean on me faster each time. I expect you to learn to call on me and to trust me more every time. I expect you to get closer to me with each battle and with each blessing. I expect that.
I don't expect you to be perfect, ever. That is what my blood is for, to cover your imperfections while you learn. You are perfected in Christ and no other way. Will you ever struggle with bitterness again, maybe. Will you be quicker to turn to me, I guarantee it. That is what I expect of you.
That is really the point of every life lesson. To learn how to turn to me for help faster and with complete trust. No matter the issue, no mater the problem, turn to me. Learn that and you don't need anything else really.
I love you daughter, it is true. I am crazy about you. I will love you for all eternity and my love will never waiver. I adore you just as you are and I will teach you everything you need to know. Rest now.
